36 Lessons I’ve Unlearned

Last year, on my birthday, I wrote 35 lessons that I learned in 35 years.  This year, I will share my 36th lesson that I learned, but first I wanted to share 36 “lessons” that I have unlearned.

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I have learned that all of these are not true at all:

1.  I need to “matter.”

2.  “Others” and “myself” are two separate categories.

3.  There is a wrong way to live.

4.  The things other people say should be taken at face value.

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5.  It is possible to have my needs met through another person.

6.  My actions don’t affect those around me.

7.  It is possible for love not to exist.

8.  Hierarchies exist.

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9.  Selfishness is caused my giving yourself too much attention.

10.  Narcissism is caused by loving yourself too much.

11. The “smoothest” relationships are the most beneficial.

12.  Experiencing fear makes me a failure.

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13.  It is not possible for me to experience inner peace.

14.  There is a such things as a coward.

15.  Character flaws exist.

16.  There are people who have it all together and never experience (or act upon) fear.

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17.  Having fewer possessions is virtuous.

18.  Willpower can solve problems.

19.  There is a such thing as “negative” thoughts and emotions.

20. It is necessary to fight some things in life.

21.  If someone really cares, they will be a part of our life forever.

22.  What we see, is what is real.

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23.  Autism is a hindrance.

24.  I have a “past.”

25.  The past exists.

26.  Judgement exists.

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27.  Hate exists.

28.  It is possible to lose weight without loving your body.

29.  We should always give advice to help those around us.

30. Talking about problems makes them more manageable.

31.  Drama is inevitable.

32.  Conflict is a part of being in a relationship.

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33.  There are dark and light times in our lives.

34.  Strong emotions add color to life.

35.  I am my thoughts and emotions.

36.   There is a such thing as unworthiness.

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It’s been an exciting trip around the sun, to be sure!  What are some lessons in life that you have unlearned?

2 thoughts on “36 Lessons I’ve Unlearned

  1. Bethany, I’m interested to see you expand on some of these to explain your thought processes, because although I nodded my head at most of them, there were a few that left me wondering. You don’t think there are dark and light times in our lives? I am interested to hear about that one, because for me, I’ve had my share of both. The dark times were learning opportunities for me, and made the light times sweeter.

    • Of course I’ll be doing posts on these, Joy! I think my issue is with the light and darkness metaphor. I know that I havr seen times of tremendous challenge, but I’m learning to stop seeing those times as “bad”. And most people equate “darkness” with being bad. So perhaps it’s that metaphor that is the issue.

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